How to give your partner the best massage

Welcome to The Spark (by Hunter at Show Her Off Dance).

Every Thursday, I’m going to send you a quick, five-minute email with fun date night ideas, conversation starters, and resources to help strengthen your relationship.

My goal is to help you and your partner have more fun, feel more closely connected and create more meaningful memories together (just like with Date Night Dancing).

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Date Night

Who could use a bit of relaxation? 

How about a date night that oozes calm while upping the intimacy factor? 

It’s time to give your partner a massage 💆🏻

You can get as fancy and spa-like as you want or keep it super simple. 

Just make sure to take turns! 

How to give each other a massage 

What you’ll need: 

• Candles (scented ones can create a romantic atmosphere) 

• Calming music 

• Massage oil (coconut oil works well) 

• Rolled up towel or bolster for under the knees or ankles 

• A comfortable space to lie down (the bed or a yoga mat will work) 

A few pointers: 

• Before starting, ask your partner what kind of pressure they’d like (soft and smooth or deep and intense): experiment and get feedback! 

• Set the scene: make sure you’re both relaxed before starting. Soft music and dimmed lights help. Put phones on silent and out of reach. 

• Keep your movement flowing rather than jumping from area to area. 

• Pay attention: notice if your partner tenses and avoid that area (or be extra gentle) and spend lots of time on areas that elicit moans or big sighs. 

• And remember to check in: ask them if they’d like an adjustment or for you to move to a specific area. 

Tip: It’s about the attention you give more than your technique... 

I found this video tutorial for giving a full body massage – it has super helpful instructions!  

You can also just massage their hands, feet or head, all of which are broken down in the video above. 

Budget: $20 for massage oil and candles 

The Love Lab

Let’s stick with massages – what are the benefits of giving and receiving a massage from someone you care about? 

Let me count the ways! 

The consensus is that it’s beneficial for both giver and receiver, so win-win. 

How else can massages be beneficial? 

• Gives you uninterrupted quality time together 

• Helps you practice clear communication (both speaking up and listening) 

• Focuses your attention on what your partner wants and feels good for them 

• Gives you each a chance to please the other in an intimate but non-intimidating way 

• Intimate touch between partners has been linked to longer-lasting relationships 

As you can see, touch is a really important factor in relationships.  

Not only as a way to communicate and bond with each other, but also because it produces oxytocin (aka. the love hormone). 

This creates a feeling of well-being related to your partner.  

Touch “creates a cycle of positivity, where each act of physical closeness reinforces the connection and emotional support, leading to greater relationship satisfaction.” – The Joyful Couple 

Learning to dance together also involves touch and all the above benefits, just sayin’ ;)